Its December 30th, and I am barefoot at the park, sitting in the warm Barcelona sun. Life is good. How did it get to be so good? Because a few years ago I swore to live in deep and consistent alignment with myself...and you can too!
I was asked by a man to write a pamphlet on how to start having more abundance in life with women. But, in a practical sense. How to actually start interacting with and meeting women.
If you know my content I share daily, you will be very aware I dislike 'steps' and structures in something as fluid and moment based as meeting another human being. What I really felt when reading this mans email, was where the question was coming from. It was not for her, it was for him. How can he stay true to himself in a clearly and truthful way, where he need not question or overthink going over to say hello to a beautiful stranger who effects him heavily. It happens to every man...
My pamphlet ended up being only a few words long, which is perfect It is simple, and coming from the strongest place of you.
Step 1: When you see a woman who has inspired you on some level, or has triggered attraction/curiosity in you, become aware of exactly how you are feeling and where you are at. Both mentally and physically. Basically, checking in with your authentic self in this exact moment. Without awareness first, you have no clarity. This first step is the most important, as without your awareness and presence, you do not get properly communicated.
Step 2: Go and EXPRESS these inspirations simplistically and straightforwardly, as if you were narrating your own thoughts and feelings about how they are effected by her.
Step 3: Do NOT express yourself in order to get a specific 'positive' response from her. You must begin by placing ZERO pressure or expectation on the response of a complete stranger, to your truth. This exercise in expression, is for you first. It is allowing yourself, as a man, to come back into alignment with your love for your own sexuality, masculinity, and playful desire for women. That is it.
You are following these steps of truth, for you. The result, is that many women will be very open to receiving your truth, and will be deeply nourished in a beautifully polarizing way. This will grant you both amazing experiences in life, sex, love and relationships.
Other women, will not be open to your truth at that specific moment in time. As a man of integrity, and as a man who validates his own internal worth, you will allow every woman to have zero interest in reciprocating your interest. She has every right to not be open to you. She has every right to not want to accept you. Remember, she is not your mother. A woman not wanting you, has nothing to do with how worthy you are.
If you base your worth on the response or opinion of ANYTHING external to you, you will never be stable in your life. Come to terms with that as soon as possible. Because once you do, the beauty and abundance of life will open to you in amazingly fruitful ways. Welcome the 'negative'/closed responses from women, just as much as you would welcome the positive. There really is no difference between the 2...only the meaning you place on it.
This way of being fills you with a playful and mischevious love, looking to share. The fear dissolves when you stop giving external situations control over who you are.
When you know who you are, the opinions and criticisms from others become interesting and entertaining. They dont hold much weight, because there is no cracks in your own relationship with yourself. You are solid, clear, and self reliant.
I know it may seem like i have went a little off track here, but i have not. The above steps i have shared with you, is 1 very practical method of getting to know who you truly are, via fear and confusion.
Going back to the steps...you express whatever is real for you in that moment. If that means blatantly and respectfully telling a woman the way she walks is intoxicatingly sexy...then do it! Or if it means saying "I dont know how to even start speaking to you, but i felt like i had to come and meet you"...then do that. If it means sharing something you noticed about the situation or surroundings, then do that.
There is no right and wrong, because as long as you are listening to and following your truth, it is RIGHT. The external response does not dictate if it is wrong. This is not Mathematics.
This way of being will begin to set you back into alignment with yourself quickly.
This is expressing via integrity. Show up for YOU! Own your sexuality and express your realness. How real are you willing to be?
Are you willing to be SO REAL, that you risk losing everything? Integrity!
Until next time,
If you would like to start your transformation to open up to your own freedom, make sure to check out my range of different coaching and mentoring packages HERE. Or maybe my Online Video Course may suit your situation better
Chris Bale's Blog
Founder & Head Coach.