Today, I am not posting anything educational. Instead I am choosing to share a piece of myself. The piece of myself that all my clients and students get. The piece of myself that you get, while reading and watching my content.
I have been a ‘coach’ in various capacities for many years. The thing I have come to understand is: Once a coach, always a coach.
I am ‘the coach’ with my friends. I am ‘the coach’ in my personal life with the people I meet. I am ‘the coach’ with my family. I am even ‘the coach’ for OTHER coaches. Yeah. You know those HUGE names in the ‘pick-up’ industry that have humongous businesses? Well many of them are with me for coaching weekly/monthly.
This is not complaining, as I adore serving others and guiding them towards self-sufficient happiness and reliance. If anything, this is purely for venting purposes. I want to let you in to my life.
I have found over the years, that the more I grow as an individual, the more isolated I become from mediocrity. What I mean, is that the more you evolve and expand out of the social norms, the more difficult it is to be in them, and the more intolerable it becomes to be surrounded by the worker-bees. It can be a lonely existence. Of course, the benefits and beautiful experiences completely out-way any perceived negatives.
I have spent the last 7 years very much outside of the social way of being, and working on myself relentlessly. Now, when I look around, I see lies, pain, fear, complete avoidance, and blindness. This is pretty much everywhere. I am in a café right now. Out of the 12 people in here, I can see the controlled, half-assed pain in 11 of them.
The beauty in my own life is paralleled with the pain in others.
This is nobodies fault. People cannot see what they do not want to see. That is why I work so passionately in my own purpose to assist people in breaking out of the shit storm of self-avoidance, if they wake up enough to want that.
I, or my purpose, has decided to put me in the forefront of attempting to impact those living in lies, but there is SO fucking many of them, and I have been doing it for what feels like 6 lifetimes.
I am tired. I am so tired.
It is amusing when I think back to how I began this work. It came from me being completely uninhibited, free, and indulging vigorously in my masculine desires. I spent every day immersed in the beauty of women, risk, and instinctual living. I was so full, carefree, and un-analytical in everything I did. I saw, I felt, I acted.
I would amaze some, and disgust others. My lifestyle seemed fairytale like to other men who would hear of and witness first hand my sexual daliances with the opposite sex. My vice. I would meet a girl at 3pm on a Tuesday outside a shop, and disappear with her for the next 4 days.
At this point, men started to reach out and ask of me. So I started to give a little at first to help. Then more.
I officialised it as a job role and committed to it. Then started to exchange my experiences for money. Then I built a business. Then I learned some marketing. Then…everything changed!
I was no longer living in the way that had me arrive here in the first place. I was secluded…thinking a lot. Staying with women, and settling in not ideal scenarios because I was too bogged down in my analytical job role. Using my head far more than I ever intended, or wanted to. This was in order to please the men with all the thousands of irrelevant questions. I felt like I owed them something.
I love women SO much that it is impossible for me to ever put on paper what the feminine means to me, and how women have built me as a man. The way they affect me. The innate power they have over every aspect of me. I love women, and I love fucking women. They are one of the same.
Within all the analytical deconstructing of my reality, part of me has lacked the gusto to bend the world over and fuck her lovingly from behind.
That umph. That drive. That passion…It all turned into work! That makes me sad. And with that, my edge fell asleep.
I am Tired.
I would spend time fed up after talking to an array of men who were terrible with themselves and women, to the point when I saw a beautiful woman I wanted to connect with, I would have nothing left in me. I wanted to only be with myself, and all the shit I had picked up from my clients.
The process of breaking down how I free-flow with women and life was hideous to begin with. I didn’t even know where to start. “How the hell do I explain this in words to some guy who has never even kissed a girl?”
Along this business-building process, I limited myself and my actions. I began to control what went out, in order to control what would come back in. I listened to ‘marketers’. I changed bits of my expression to appeal more to others. Basically, I sold out. I could feel it in my soul, in every moment this happened. I was basically doing the opposite to what makes me amazing with women.
I spent many hours connecting with other coaches in the dating industry who were so fucking opposite to me. I would see the shit they post, advertise, and sell. I would engage in hours of Skype chat with them about business and life…instead of actually living it like I was so accustomed to.
If given the choice, I would ALWAYS choose to hangout with drunks or druggys rather than dating coaches. There is nothing worse than the idea of being in a group of dating coaches. This is why I have turned down the majority of dating conventions I have been asked to speak at. I don’t want to be around any of these weird fuck-heads.
I would see the marketing in other businesses, and I got wrapped up in it, and I strangled the essence of me, which is what allowed me to start this journey in the first place. I arrived as a pussy-juice-soaked example. I ended up as a ‘coach’. Ugh. Vomit.
I have gotten to the point of detesting the idea of talking about how to hook-up with girls or any variety of seduction. At this exact moment, I do not want to ‘teach’ anyone anything, as all it is doing, is getting in the way of me living that life which I adore, and don’t have to think about. This is why I am taking a little break, and looking to hire another man to help guide my clients when I simply don’t want to.
I remember, it was a Wednesday evening in Barcelona, I looked up at the clock, and realized I had been speaking for 2 hours to my client about how to start a conversation with a girl! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!
The Chris who originally came into this business would of laughed at that question, and probably responded with “stop being such a pussy, just go and say whatever the hell you want. Now go away, Im fingering this girl, and you are interrupting us”.
This job is all about first feeling it, then growing the skillset to communicate it, which basically turns you into a gigantic book of bullshit.
In this business, we need to be constantly releasing material to generate new clients and income. This means, saying the same fucking thing OVER and OVER again in thousands of different ways.
Simply put, right now, I really don’t give a fuck about this.
My time is now being spent with me, for me, and nobody else.
I am allowing myself to fill back up and be that free-flowing man.
I currently have a number of clients on my coaching programs, both online and in-person. I assure you men, you will as always, get the very best from me, so do not worry about that. I am dedicated and committed to anybody who comes under my wing at any point.
I am going to move much deeper into the internal and simplistic side of this part of man. Thankfully, it took me about 2 weeks to wake my edge back up, and I am in a state of offensive bliss which I have missed. I feel alive. This message is going to be shared soon, in a very caveman like way. I cannot delivery flowery watered down bullshit anymore.
I am still taking on clients for coaching, but much less. It is also one hell of a time to book me. Great shake-your-ass-up things are coming.
I’m no longer looking for you.
You gotta’ look for me motherfucker!
Chris Bale's Blog
Founder & Head Coach.